{"id":111,"date":"2021-03-24T18:31:00","date_gmt":"2021-03-24T21:31:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/mais-algumas-de-maes-judias-2\/"},"modified":"2021-03-24T18:38:44","modified_gmt":"2021-03-24T21:38:44","slug":"pilulas-de-humor-judaico-15","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pilulas-de-humor-judaico-15\/","title":{"rendered":"P\u00edlulas de Humor Judaico (15)"},"content":{"rendered":"

O Dote da Noiva<\/span><\/strong><\/em>
\nJacob est\u00e1 conversando com seu amigo Morris:<\/span>
\n– “Uma coisa terr\u00edvel. <\/span>Minha filha Rifka vai se casar amanh\u00e3 e eu prometi um dote de 25 mil libras. S\u00f3 que metade do dote est\u00e1 faltando.”<\/span><\/span><\/em>
\nMorris respondeu:<\/span><\/span>\u00a0<\/span>
\n– “E da\u00ed? O costume \u00e9 pagar apenas a metade do dote no dia do casamento”.<\/span><\/span><\/em>
\nE Jacob esclareceu:<\/span>
\n– “Eu sei, mas essa \u00e9 a metade que est\u00e1 faltando.”<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

Primeiro Dia da Filha na Escola<\/strong><\/em>
\nSara foi levar a filha at\u00e9 o ponto do \u00f4nibus da escola no primeiro dia do jardim de inf\u00e2ncia:<\/span><\/span>
\n– \u201cSe cuide, meu amorzinho, e n\u00e3o esque\u00e7a que a m\u00e3ezinha te ama. Quando voc\u00ea sair da escolinha eu estarei aqui te esperando, docinho. Eu te amo muito, minha gatinha.\u201d<\/span>
\n<\/span><\/span><\/em>No fim do dia, quando o \u00f4nibus chegou, ela correu at\u00e9 a menina e a abra\u00e7ou, ansiosa pelas not\u00edcias:<\/span><\/span>
\n– \u201cE ent\u00e3o, minha fofinha, o que voc\u00ea aprendeu no primeiro dia da escolinha?\u201d<\/span>
\n<\/span><\/span><\/em>A menina respondeu:<\/span><\/span>
\n– \u201cAprendi que meu nome \u00e9 Miriam.\u201d<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

A M\u00e3e Psic\u00f3loga<\/b><\/span><\/em>
\nA m\u00e3e judia escreveu um recado para a professora do filho:<\/span>
\n– \u201cSe o meu Bernardo n\u00e3o se comportar bem, n\u00e3o brigue com ele. Brigue com o menino do lado, ele vai captar o esp\u00edrito da coisa.\u201d<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

\"\"
\nFoto: Yannis H – Unsplash<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/a><\/div>\n
\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

O Dote da Noiva Jacob est\u00e1 conversando com seu amigo Morris: – “Uma coisa terr\u00edvel. Minha filha Rifka vai se casar amanh\u00e3 e eu prometi um dote de 25 mil libras. S\u00f3 que metade do dote est\u00e1 faltando.” Morris respondeu:\u00a0 – “E da\u00ed? O costume \u00e9 pagar apenas a metade do dote no dia do […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":21858,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-111","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sem-categoria"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nP\u00edlulas de Humor Judaico (15) | Blog do Guelmann<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pilulas-de-humor-judaico-15\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"pt_BR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"P\u00edlulas de Humor Judaico (15) | Blog do Guelmann\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"O Dote da Noiva Jacob est\u00e1 conversando com seu amigo Morris: – “Uma coisa terr\u00edvel. Minha filha Rifka vai se casar amanh\u00e3 e eu prometi um dote de 25 mil libras. S\u00f3 que metade do dote est\u00e1 faltando.” Morris respondeu:\u00a0 – “E da\u00ed? 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Em Israel, Metade da Produ\u00e7\u00e3o Agr\u00edcola \u00e9 de \u00c1gua de Reuso.","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"24 de novembro de 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Acabo de ouvir no notici\u00e1rio que em Alagoas a crise da falta de \u00e1gua no sert\u00e3o est\u00e1 for\u00e7ando o governo a retomar a opera\u00e7\u00e3o dos caminh\u00f5es-pipa para abastecer os munic\u00edpios que est\u00e3o com decreto de emerg\u00eancia. A situa\u00e7\u00e3o que se repete desde sempre \u00e9 uma das mais cru\u00e9is e vergonhosas\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/IMG_5783-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C674&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/IMG_5783-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C674&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/IMG_5783-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C674&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/IMG_5783-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C674&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/IMG_5783-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C674&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":22762,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pilulas-de-humor-judaico-51\/","url_meta":{"origin":111,"position":2},"title":"P\u00edlulas de Humor Judaico (51)","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"24 de mar\u00e7o de 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"David Aizenberg no Cardiologista David Aizenberg, j\u00e1 passado dos 80 anos, estava em uma consulta m\u00e9dica. Enquanto ouvia seu cora\u00e7\u00e3o com o estetosc\u00f3pio, o cardiologista come\u00e7ou a murmurar, em tom de preocupa\u00e7\u00e3o. O idoso perguntou ao m\u00e9dico qual era o problema. \u2013\u00a0\u201cOlhe, teu cora\u00e7\u00e3o piorou muito e voc\u00ea est\u00e1 com\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/REZA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/REZA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/REZA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/REZA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/REZA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":21625,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/um-whatsapp-pela-metade-aceita\/","url_meta":{"origin":111,"position":3},"title":"Um WhatsApp Pela Metade, Aceita?","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"23 de fevereiro de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Os Amigos leitores do Blog acompanham h\u00e1 muito minhas postagens sobre o problema criado pelos desenvolvedores do aplicativo WhatsApp (a \u00faltima foi h\u00e1 2 dias). A pol\u00eamica gira em torno da decis\u00e3o de alterar os termos de uso e a pol\u00edtica de privacidade, cuja concord\u00e2ncia est\u00e1 sendo solicitada. 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Moacyr e eu temos uma prima em comum, a querida Vera Scliar Sasson, pelo lado paterno dele e materno pelo meu. 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J\u00e1 sentado, correu os olhos pelo card\u00e1pio e optou por truta assada, servida inteira. O prato n\u00e3o demorou muito para ser servido. 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