{"id":1547,"date":"2020-12-23T13:47:31","date_gmt":"2020-12-23T16:47:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/?p=1547"},"modified":"2020-12-23T13:47:14","modified_gmt":"2020-12-23T16:47:14","slug":"pilulas-de-humor-judaico-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pilulas-de-humor-judaico-2\/","title":{"rendered":"P\u00edlulas de Humor Judaico (2)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Os Rabinos e a Moral<\/span><\/span><\/b> <\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Dois Rabinos discutiam sobre o decl\u00ednio da moral nos tempos atuais, e um deles disse:<\/span>
\n– \u201cEu n\u00e3o dormi com minha mulher antes de nos casarmos. E voc\u00ea?\u201d<\/i><\/span>
\n– \u201cN\u00e3o sei\u201d<\/i> – respondeu o outro. – “Qual era o sobrenome de solteira dela?\u201d<\/i><\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

Recurso Infal\u00edvel<\/b><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Num shopping movimentado, Uriel se aproxima de uma mo\u00e7a linda:<\/span>
\n– \u201cVoc\u00ea teria um tempinho para conversar comigo?\u201d<\/i><\/span>
\n– \u201cClaro que n\u00e3o! Porque eu faria isso?\u201d<\/i><\/span>
\n– \u201cPorque minha mulher sumiu, mas sempre que estou falando com <\/i>uma mo\u00e7a bonita ela aparece.\u201d<\/i><\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

Como Isso Ser\u00e1 Poss\u00edvel?<\/b><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Na praia, no ver\u00e3o, Abra\u00e3o entrou no mar e quase se afogou. Por sorte foi socorrido pelo <\/span>Guarda-vidas<\/span> e, enquanto era resgatad<\/span>o<\/span>, fez uma promessa solene:
\n<\/span><\/span>– \u201cJuro que nunca mais entro na \u00e1gua, at\u00e9 aprender a nadar.\u201d<\/i><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Os Rabinos e a Moral Dois Rabinos discutiam sobre o decl\u00ednio da moral nos tempos atuais, e um deles disse: – \u201cEu n\u00e3o dormi com minha mulher antes de nos casarmos. E voc\u00ea?\u201d – \u201cN\u00e3o sei\u201d – respondeu o outro. – “Qual era o sobrenome de solteira dela?\u201d Recurso Infal\u00edvel Num shopping movimentado, Uriel se […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":15221,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1547","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sem-categoria"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nP\u00edlulas de Humor Judaico (2) | Blog do Guelmann<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pilulas-de-humor-judaico-2\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"pt_BR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"P\u00edlulas de Humor Judaico (2) | Blog do Guelmann\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Os Rabinos e a Moral Dois Rabinos discutiam sobre o decl\u00ednio da moral nos tempos atuais, e um deles disse: – \u201cEu n\u00e3o dormi com minha mulher antes de nos casarmos. E voc\u00ea?\u201d – \u201cN\u00e3o sei\u201d – respondeu o outro. – “Qual era o sobrenome de solteira dela?\u201d Recurso Infal\u00edvel Num shopping movimentado, Uriel se […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pilulas-de-humor-judaico-2\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Blog do Guelmann\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-12-23T16:47:31+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/1504620687-bill_bower_image.jpg?fit=1000%2C625&ssl=1\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1000\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"625\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Gerson Guelmann\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Escrito por\" \/>\n\t<meta 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E voc\u00ea?\u201d \u2013\u00a0\u201cN\u00e3o sei\u201d\u00a0\u2013 respondeu o outro. \u2013 \u201cQual era o sobrenome de solteira dela?\u201d Recurso Infal\u00edvel Num shopping movimentado,\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/HojePR-7-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/HojePR-7-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/HojePR-7-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/HojePR-7-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/HojePR-7-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":495,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/rabinos-sinagogas\/","url_meta":{"origin":1547,"position":1},"title":"Rabinos & Sinagogas","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"22 de abril de 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"O Rabino e o Fiscal da Receita Um Rabino estava em seu escrit\u00f3rio quando foi procurado por um homem: - \"Rabino, sou Auditor do Imposto de Renda. H\u00e1 um membro na sua Congrega\u00e7\u00e3o chamado David Tepper?\" - \"Sim, ele frequenta a minha Sinagoga e eu o conhe\u00e7o bem\" - respondeu\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/04\/SINAGOGA-scaled.jpg?fit=789%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/04\/SINAGOGA-scaled.jpg?fit=789%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/04\/SINAGOGA-scaled.jpg?fit=789%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/04\/SINAGOGA-scaled.jpg?fit=789%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":5075,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/tres-na-quarta-de-humor-judaico-77\/","url_meta":{"origin":1547,"position":2},"title":"Tr\u00eas na Quarta de Humor Judaico","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"18 de fevereiro de 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"Fiquem Tranquilos, Temos Rabinos a Bordo Um grupo de Rabinos estava em um voo para Israel quando o Comandante informou que o avi\u00e3o estava enfrentando um problema t\u00e9cnico.\u00a0Os passageiros ficaram bastante preocupados e a tens\u00e3o aumentou quando o avi\u00e3o sofreu um abalo.\u00a0O Comandante voltou a falar e avisou que a\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/HojePR-6.png?fit=600%2C400&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/HojePR-6.png?fit=600%2C400&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/HojePR-6.png?fit=600%2C400&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1825,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/corrente-de-rabinos\/","url_meta":{"origin":1547,"position":3},"title":"A Corrente de Rabinos","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"25 de novembro de 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"O Diretor da entidade mantenedora da Sinagoga de uma pequena cidade norte-americana recebeu uma correspond\u00eancia nos seguintes termos: \"Uma pesquisa recente demonstrou que o Rabino perfeito precisa ter as seguintes caracter\u00edsticas: * Seus serm\u00f5es n\u00e3o podem passar de 15 minutos; * Ele deve condenar o pecado e os comportamentos errados,\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/09\/Chains.jpg?fit=512%2C340&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":156,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/duas-de-rabinos\/","url_meta":{"origin":1547,"position":4},"title":"Duas de Rabinos","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"17 de mar\u00e7o de 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"1 - Um Rabino estava fazendo seu primeiro serm\u00e3o na Congrega\u00e7\u00e3o para a qual rec\u00e9m havia sido contratado e a certa altura acenou para um auxiliar e lhe disse: - \u201cVeja, ali na terceira fila, aquele homem est\u00e1 dormindo.\u201d O homem respondeu: - \"Rabino, como o senhor \u00e9 novo aqui,\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/BAR.jpg?fit=1200%2C721&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/BAR.jpg?fit=1200%2C721&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/BAR.jpg?fit=1200%2C721&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/BAR.jpg?fit=1200%2C721&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/BAR.jpg?fit=1200%2C721&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":5967,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/a-discussao-dos-rabinos-e-a-voz-de-d-us\/","url_meta":{"origin":1547,"position":5},"title":"A Discuss\u00e3o dos Rabinos e a Voz de D-us","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"30 de setembro de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Quatro rabinos estavam discutindo argumentos teol\u00f3gicos, e o resultado era sempre o mesmo: tr\u00eas contra um. Depois de algum tempo, o Rabino que sempre era vencido resolveu apelar para uma autoridade superior: - \"D-us!\"- exclamou ele - \"eu sei que estou certo! Por favor, mande-me um sinal para provar isso\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/man-listening.jpg?fit=960%2C640&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/man-listening.jpg?fit=960%2C640&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/man-listening.jpg?fit=960%2C640&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/man-listening.jpg?fit=960%2C640&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1547","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1547"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1547\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15221"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1547"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1547"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1547"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}