{"id":165,"date":"2020-12-07T19:18:00","date_gmt":"2020-12-07T22:18:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-1\/"},"modified":"2020-12-07T19:17:35","modified_gmt":"2020-12-07T22:17:35","slug":"frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-1\/","title":{"rendered":"Frases dos Melhores Humoristas Judeus (1)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\"><strong>* Fran Lebowitz<\/strong> <em>(Frances Ann Lebowitz \u2013 Nova Jersey, 27\/10\/1950)<br \/>\n<\/em>&#8211; &#8220;Fiz as contas e cheguei a conclus\u00e3o de que as chances de ganhar na loteria s\u00e3o as mesmas, se voc\u00ea jogar ou n\u00e3o.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\"><strong>* Billy Crystal<\/strong>\u00a0<i><em>(<\/em><\/i><i><em>William Edward Crystal \u2013 Nova York, 14\/3\/1948)<br \/>\n<\/em><\/i>&#8211; &#8220;Quando pego um livro novo, leio primeiro a \u00faltima p\u00e1gina. Assim, se eu morrer antes de terminar, j\u00e1 sei o final da hist\u00f3ria.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\">* <strong>Rita Rudner\u00a0<\/strong><em>(Rita Rudner \u2013 Miami, 17\/9\/1953)<br \/>\n<\/em>&#8211; &#8220;Cada vez que eu vejo um homem, penso: &#8216;ser\u00e1 esse o pai com quem vou gostar que meus filhos passem os finais de semana&#8217;?&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\">* <strong>Joan Rivers\u00a0<\/strong>((<em>Joan Alexandra Molinsky \u2013 Nova York, 8\/6\/1933 \u2013 4\/9\/2014)<\/em><br \/>\n&#8211; &#8220;Minha m\u00e3e me ensinou: &#8216;o homem por cima e a mulher por baixo&#8217;. Por anos a fio meu marido e eu dormimos em beliche.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\">* <strong>Henny Youngman<\/strong> <em>(Henny Henry Youngmann \u2013 Liverpool, 16\/3\/1906 \u2013 Flushing, 24\/2\/1998)<br \/>\n&#8211;\u00a0<\/em>&#8220;O cavalo em que apostei era t\u00e3o lento que o j\u00f3quei fez um di\u00e1rio da viagem.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"19801\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-1\/joquei\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Joquei.jpg?fit=1051%2C701&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1051,701\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Joquei\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Joquei.jpg?fit=300%2C200&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Joquei.jpg?fit=640%2C427&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-19801\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Joquei.jpg?resize=300%2C200&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Joquei.jpg?resize=300%2C200&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Joquei.jpg?resize=1024%2C683&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Joquei.jpg?resize=768%2C512&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Joquei.jpg?resize=750%2C500&amp;ssl=1 750w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Joquei.jpg?w=1051&amp;ssl=1 1051w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/p>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><\/div>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>* Fran Lebowitz (Frances Ann Lebowitz \u2013 Nova Jersey, 27\/10\/1950) &#8211; &#8220;Fiz as contas e cheguei a conclus\u00e3o de que as chances de ganhar na loteria s\u00e3o as mesmas, se voc\u00ea jogar ou n\u00e3o.&#8221; * Billy Crystal\u00a0(William Edward Crystal \u2013 Nova York, 14\/3\/1948) &#8211; &#8220;Quando pego um livro novo, leio primeiro a \u00faltima p\u00e1gina. Assim, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":19801,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-165","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sem-categoria"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Frases dos Melhores Humoristas Judeus (1) | Blog do Guelmann<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-1\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"pt_BR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Frases dos Melhores Humoristas Judeus (1) | Blog do Guelmann\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"* Fran Lebowitz (Frances Ann Lebowitz \u2013 Nova Jersey, 27\/10\/1950) &#8211; &#8220;Fiz as contas e cheguei a conclus\u00e3o de que as chances de ganhar na loteria s\u00e3o as mesmas, se voc\u00ea jogar ou n\u00e3o.&#8221; * Billy Crystal\u00a0(William Edward Crystal \u2013 Nova York, 14\/3\/1948) &#8211; &#8220;Quando pego um livro novo, leio primeiro a \u00faltima p\u00e1gina. 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Finalmente eu n\u00e3o aguentei e deixei ela sair\u201d. *\u00a0Victor Borge\u00a0(B\u00f8rge Rosenbaum \u2013 Copenhague, 3\/1\/1909 \u2013 Greenwich, 23\/12\/2000) \u2013 \u201cPapai Noel teve a melhor ideia: visitar as\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em &quot;Sem categoria&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Swiss-bank.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Swiss-bank.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Swiss-bank.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Swiss-bank.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Swiss-bank.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":10514,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-41\/","url_meta":{"origin":165,"position":1},"title":"Frases dos Melhores Humoristas Judeus (41)","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"27 de setembro de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"*\u00a0Henny Youngman\u00a0(Henny Henry Youngmann \u2013 Liverpool, 16\/3\/1906 \u2013 Flushing, 24\/2\/1998) - \"Se minha m\u00e3e souber que vivo disso, ela me mata. Ela acha que eu ainda sou traficante\". *\u00a0Milton Berle\u00a0(Mendel Berlinger \u2013 Nova York, 12\/7\/1908 \u00a0\u2013 Los Angeles,\u00a027\/3\/2002) - \"Se a evolu\u00e7\u00e3o realmente existiu, como \u00e9 que as m\u00e3es t\u00eam\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em &quot;Sem categoria&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/MORCEGO-scaled.jpg?fit=675%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/MORCEGO-scaled.jpg?fit=675%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/MORCEGO-scaled.jpg?fit=675%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2717,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-19\/","url_meta":{"origin":165,"position":2},"title":"Frases dos Melhores Humoristas Judeus (19)","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"12 de abril de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"*\u00a0Rodney Dangerfield\u00a0(Jacob Cohen \u2013 Long Island, 22\/11\/1921 \u2013 Los Angeles,\u00a05\/10\/2004) \u2013 \u201cEu estou ficando t\u00e3o velho que minha seguradora s\u00f3 me manda a metade do calend\u00e1rio.\" *\u00a0Tom Lehrer\u00a0(Thomas Andrew Lehrer\u00a0\u2013 Nova York, 9\/4\/1928) \u2013 \u201cNo formul\u00e1rio do imposto de renda dizia 'assinale abaixo se voc\u00ea for cego'. Me deu vontade\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em &quot;Sem categoria&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/picasso-5396719_1920.png?fit=1200%2C983&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/picasso-5396719_1920.png?fit=1200%2C983&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/picasso-5396719_1920.png?fit=1200%2C983&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/picasso-5396719_1920.png?fit=1200%2C983&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/picasso-5396719_1920.png?fit=1200%2C983&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":22570,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-51\/","url_meta":{"origin":165,"position":3},"title":"Frases dos Melhores Humoristas Judeus (51)","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"21 de dezembro de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"*\u00a0Lewis Black\u00a0(Lewis Niles Black \u2013 30\/8\/1948 \u2013 Washington) - \"Eu n\u00e3o como fibras. Comi um muffin de farelo de trigo e aveia h\u00e1 10 anos e ainda sinto ele\".\u00a0 *\u00a0Mel Brooks\u00a0(Melvin Kaminsky \u2013 Nova York, 28\/6\/1926) - \"Se D-us quisesse que a gente voasse, teria nos dado passagens\". * Milton\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em &quot;Sem categoria&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/ORELHA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C801&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/ORELHA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C801&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/ORELHA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C801&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/ORELHA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C801&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/12\/ORELHA-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C801&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":11208,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-42\/","url_meta":{"origin":165,"position":4},"title":"Frases dos Melhores Humoristas Judeus (42)","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"4 de outubro de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"* Elaine May (Elaine Iva Berlin - Philadelphia (EUA), 21\/4\/1932) - \"Eu tentei n\u00e3o saber absolutamente nada sobre muitas coisas, e consegui fazer isso muito bem\". *\u00a0George Burns\u00a0(Nathan Birnbaum \u2013 Nova York, 20\/1\/1896 \u2013 Beverly Hills, 9\/3\/1996) - \"Eu s\u00f3 preciso de 1 drinque para ficar b\u00eabado. O problema \u00e9\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em &quot;Sem categoria&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/IO-IO.jpg?fit=638%2C407&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/IO-IO.jpg?fit=638%2C407&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/IO-IO.jpg?fit=638%2C407&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4739,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/frases-dos-melhores-humoristas-judeus-25\/","url_meta":{"origin":165,"position":5},"title":"Frases dos Melhores Humoristas Judeus (25)","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"31 de maio de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"* Rodney Dangerfield\u00a0(Jacob Cohen \u2013 Long Island, 22\/11\/1921 \u2013 Los Angeles,\u00a05\/10\/2004) - \"N\u00f3s dormimos em quartos separados e tiramos f\u00e9rias separadamente. Estamos fazendo tudo o que podemos para continuar casados\". *\u00a0Tom Lehrer\u00a0(Thomas Andrew Lehrer\u00a0\u2013 Nova York, 9\/4\/1928) - \"Eu acho que se a pessoa tem dificuldades para se comunicar, o\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em &quot;Sem categoria&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Cavalo.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Cavalo.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Cavalo.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Cavalo.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/Cavalo.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=165"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/19801"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=165"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=165"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=165"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}