{"id":19020,"date":"2021-03-04T13:45:14","date_gmt":"2021-03-04T16:45:14","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/?p=19020"},"modified":"2024-07-11T15:17:38","modified_gmt":"2024-07-11T18:17:38","slug":"pragas-e-maldicoes-judaicas-11","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pragas-e-maldicoes-judaicas-11\/","title":{"rendered":"Pragas e Maldi\u00e7\u00f5es Judaicas (11)"},"content":{"rendered":"

– “Que um raio te fulmine enquanto voc\u00ea estiver falando”.<\/span><\/p>\n

– “Que voc\u00ea fale t\u00e3o eloquentemente que s\u00f3 um gato te entenda”.<\/span><\/p>\n

– “Que voc\u00ea tenha um prazer muito grande bebendo vodca de boa qualidade e que teu sangue se transforme em u\u00edsque, para que 100 percevejos fiquem b\u00eabados e dancem a mazurka no teu umbigo”.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

– “Que voc\u00ea seja t\u00e3o louco por boa comida que se se transforme em uma panqueca e que teu inimigo se transforme em um gato, te coma e engasgue para que possamos nos livrar dos dois”.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

– “Que a tua sorte ilumine o teu caminho como a lua minguante no fim do m\u00eas”.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"Foto: Christian Papaux<\/a> – Unsplash<\/a><\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

– “Que um raio te fulmine enquanto voc\u00ea estiver falando”. – “Que voc\u00ea fale t\u00e3o eloquentemente que s\u00f3 um gato te entenda”. – “Que voc\u00ea tenha um prazer muito grande bebendo vodca de boa qualidade e que teu sangue se transforme em u\u00edsque, para que 100 percevejos fiquem b\u00eabados e dancem a mazurka no teu […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":21701,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19020","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sem-categoria"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nPragas e Maldi\u00e7\u00f5es Judaicas (11) | Blog do Guelmann<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" 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Abrindo os classificados da Associa\u00e7\u00e3o de Atores viu um an\u00fancio que dizia \u201cPrecisa-se de ator para interpretar um macaco\u201d.\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/HojePR-3.jpg?fit=740%2C1110&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/HojePR-3.jpg?fit=740%2C1110&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/HojePR-3.jpg?fit=740%2C1110&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/HojePR-3.jpg?fit=740%2C1110&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":23506,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/sexta-do-humor-e-da-cultura-judaica-izzy-chaskel-o-check-up-e-a-genealogia\/","url_meta":{"origin":19020,"position":1},"title":"Sexta do Humor e da Cultura Judaica: Izzy Chaskel, o Check-Up e a Genealogia","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"2 de agosto de 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"Izzy Chaskel, o Check-Up e a Genealogia O m\u00e9dico que atendia Izzy Chaskel faleceu e quando chegou a \u00e9poca do check-up anual, ele procurou um novo cl\u00ednico. Terminado o exame, o m\u00e9dico lhe disse: - \u201cIzzy, voc\u00ea est\u00e1 em \u00f3tima forma para um homem de 60 anos. Vou requisitar exames\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/HojePR.jpg?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/HojePR.jpg?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/HojePR.jpg?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/HojePR.jpg?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":19789,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pragas-e-maldicoes-judaicas-20\/","url_meta":{"origin":19020,"position":2},"title":"Pragas e Maldi\u00e7\u00f5es Judaicas (20)","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"6 de maio de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"- \"Que o teu f\u00edgado saia em peda\u00e7os pelo teu nariz\". - \"Que os pelos do teu nariz cres\u00e7am tanto que encostem na tua sopa\". - \"Que voc\u00ea seja ro\u00eddo pela s\u00edfilis e que teu nariz caia\". - \"Que o teu caso seja t\u00e3o s\u00e9rio que o m\u00e9dico precise de\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/Rastelo.jpg?fit=960%2C640&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/Rastelo.jpg?fit=960%2C640&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/Rastelo.jpg?fit=960%2C640&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/Rastelo.jpg?fit=960%2C640&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":19639,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pragas-e-maldicoes-judaicas-18\/","url_meta":{"origin":19020,"position":3},"title":"Pragas e Maldi\u00e7\u00f5es Judaicas (18)","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"22 de abril de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Nota minha: - ap\u00f3s ter publicado 17 colunas com as melhores (ou seriam as piores?...) pragas judaicas, come\u00e7o a ter dificuldade para encontrar fontes de novas express\u00f5es. Lembro que cada publica\u00e7\u00e3o t\u00eam 5 delas, ou seja, j\u00e1 traduzi e adaptei 85. Assim, come\u00e7o hoje a publicar uma nova s\u00e9rie, todas\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/PORK.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/PORK.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/PORK.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/PORK.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/PORK.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":23821,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/tres-na-quarta-de-humor-judaico-17\/","url_meta":{"origin":19020,"position":4},"title":"Tr\u00eas na Quarta de Humor Judaico","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"25 de dezembro de 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"O Brinquedo e a Promessa Uma m\u00e3e judia estava andando na rua com o filho pequeno. Quando passaram na vitrine de uma loja de brinquedos o menino apontou para um e pediu que ela o comprasse. A m\u00e3e respondeu: - \"Eu compro, desde que voc\u00ea fa\u00e7a uma coisa\". - \"O\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/HojePR-15.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/HojePR-15.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/HojePR-15.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/HojePR-15.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/12\/HojePR-15.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":22346,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/pragas-e-maldicoes-judaicas-modernas\/","url_meta":{"origin":19020,"position":5},"title":"Pragas e Maldi\u00e7\u00f5es Judaicas Modernas","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"22 de julho de 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"J\u00e1 existe um repert\u00f3rio de Pragas e Maldi\u00e7\u00f5es Judaicas modernas! - \"Que tua m\u00e3e instale no teu celular um aplicativo que permita que ela te encontre atrav\u00e9s do GPS e quando ela desconfiar do lugar onde voc\u00ea est\u00e1, uma grava\u00e7\u00e3o com a voz dela diga \"Voc\u00ea est\u00e1 partindo meu cora\u00e7\u00e3o!\"\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em "Sem categoria"","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/MAREA.png?fit=914%2C499&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/MAREA.png?fit=914%2C499&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/MAREA.png?fit=914%2C499&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/07\/MAREA.png?fit=914%2C499&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19020","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19020"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19020\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/21701"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19020"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19020"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19020"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}