{"id":6131,"date":"2019-11-04T21:20:58","date_gmt":"2019-11-04T23:20:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/?p=6131"},"modified":"2019-11-04T22:25:49","modified_gmt":"2019-11-05T00:25:49","slug":"o-vexame-na-porta-do-banco-nao-tem-como-nao-rir","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/o-vexame-na-porta-do-banco-nao-tem-como-nao-rir\/","title":{"rendered":"O Vexame na Porta do Banco (N\u00e3o Tem Como N\u00e3o Rir)"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"text-align: left;\">\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\">Recolhido nas redes:<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\">&#8220;Fui no banco com a minha m\u00e3e. Ela entrou na frente e na minha vez o alarme tocou e a porta travou.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\">Eu estava sem cinto, sem rel\u00f3gio, sem nada.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\">Tentei de novo, o alarme tocou outra vez.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\">A\u00ed minha m\u00e3e gritou l\u00e1 de dentro:<br \/>\n<\/span><em style=\"color: #000000; font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt;\">&#8211; Tira o prego da Havaiana, animal!<\/p>\n<p><\/em><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><span style=\"font-family: georgia, palatino, serif; font-size: 18pt; color: #000000;\">Passei a maior vergonha&#8221;.<\/span><\/div>\n<div><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"6132\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/o-vexame-na-porta-do-banco-nao-tem-como-nao-rir\/banco-3\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Banco.jpg?fit=1280%2C720&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1280,720\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Banco\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Banco.jpg?fit=300%2C169&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Banco.jpg?fit=640%2C360&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-6132 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Banco.jpg?resize=300%2C169&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"169\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Banco.jpg?resize=300%2C169&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Banco.jpg?resize=768%2C432&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Banco.jpg?resize=1024%2C576&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Banco.jpg?w=1280&amp;ssl=1 1280w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Recolhido nas redes: &#8220;Fui no banco com a minha m\u00e3e. Ela entrou na frente e na minha vez o alarme tocou e a porta travou. Eu estava sem cinto, sem rel\u00f3gio, sem nada. Tentei de novo, o alarme tocou outra vez. A\u00ed minha m\u00e3e gritou l\u00e1 de dentro: &#8211; Tira o prego da Havaiana, animal! [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":6132,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6131","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sem-categoria"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>O Vexame na Porta do Banco (N\u00e3o Tem Como N\u00e3o Rir) | Blog do Guelmann<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/o-vexame-na-porta-do-banco-nao-tem-como-nao-rir\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"pt_BR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"O Vexame na Porta do Banco (N\u00e3o Tem Como N\u00e3o Rir) | Blog do Guelmann\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Recolhido nas redes: &#8220;Fui no banco com a minha m\u00e3e. Ela entrou na frente e na minha vez o alarme tocou e a porta travou. Eu estava sem cinto, sem rel\u00f3gio, sem nada. Tentei de novo, o alarme tocou outra vez. A\u00ed minha m\u00e3e gritou l\u00e1 de dentro: &#8211; Tira o prego da Havaiana, animal! 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Como precisariam ficar fora todo o final de semana, tiveram que convencer as esposas, mas finalmente o programa foi marcado. 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Ao se apresentar a noiva disse que seu nome era \"Magaskawee\" mas a sogra poderia cham\u00e1-la de \"Mo\u00e7a Graciosa\", que\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em &quot;Sem categoria&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/HojePR-6.png?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/HojePR-6.png?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/HojePR-6.png?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/HojePR-6.png?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/HojePR-6.png?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":26178,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/tres-na-quarta-de-humor-judaico-47\/","url_meta":{"origin":6131,"position":2},"title":"Tr\u00eas na Quarta de Humor Judaico","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"30 de julho de 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"Revela\u00e7\u00f5es Na Lua de Mel Ezra e Leah se casaram e, na primeira noite na cama, ele a abra\u00e7ou com carinho e sussurrou docemente: \u2014 Leah, querida, por favor, levante sua camisola. Muito docemente, ela respondeu: \u2014 N\u00e3\u00e3\u00e3o... Ezra insistiu, agora um pouco mais firme: \u2014 Leah, levante a camisola.\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em &quot;Sem categoria&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/HojePR-21.jpg?fit=480%2C400&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":729,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/a-catolica-a-protestante-e-a-judia-na-porta-do-ceu\/","url_meta":{"origin":6131,"position":3},"title":"A Cat\u00f3lica, a Protestante e a Judia na Porta do C\u00e9u","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"28 de maio de 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Tr\u00eas mulheres, uma cat\u00f3lica, uma protestante e uma judia, morreram e foram para o c\u00e9u. Foram recebidas pelo anjo encarregado da portaria, que pediu para cada uma dizer porque mereciam ir para o Para\u00edso. 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Teste de Surdez do Casal Judeu Maur\u00edcio, casado com Sara h\u00e1 mais de 50 anos, achava que a mulher estava perdendo a audi\u00e7\u00e3o. Incomodado com aquilo, por v\u00e1rias vezes tentou convence-la a ir a um m\u00e9dico, mas ela sempre se recusou, dizendo que n\u00e3o era uma velha surda como\u2026","rel":"","context":"Em &quot;Sem categoria&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Sem categoria","link":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/category\/sem-categoria\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/SURDEZ-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/SURDEZ-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/SURDEZ-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/SURDEZ-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/SURDEZ-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":7679,"url":"https:\/\/gersonguelmann.com.br\/blog\/nao-adianta-as-maes-judias-sao-assim\/","url_meta":{"origin":6131,"position":5},"title":"N\u00e3o adianta, as m\u00e3es judias s\u00e3o assim","author":"Gerson Guelmann","date":"20 de fevereiro de 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Silvia Greenberg foi eleita presidente dos Estados Unidos, tornando-se a primeira mulher a chegar a Casa Branca. Quando come\u00e7aram os preparativos para a posse, ela ligou para a m\u00e3e em Nova York para convid\u00e1-la para a solenidade oficial. A\u00ed come\u00e7ou o di\u00e1logo: - \u201cMam\u00e3e, estou ligando s\u00f3 para confirmar. 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